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Those around me seem so free,
A constant reminder of how I can be.
Knowing what it takes to feel serene,
Escapes me. Why do I still dream.
Dreams that haunt me when I awake,
The fear and dread, that it wasn’t fake.
The bottle drained, the paper empty,
The head that pounds, the heart beats plenty.
That’s the way it used to be,
When I struggled alone to make them see.
Exactly how it is inside my head,
All the time wishing I was dead.
Escape, the only way to cope,
A hard decision, chemical or rope?
The knots of confusion inside my gut,
The tangled mess, they don’t give a fuck.
Writhing and squirming, on the outside, peace.
Like it’s all together. It’s not, it’s fierce.
Whatever I do, don’t show the pain,
Keep it together, let them think you’re sane.
I sit in silence, feigning sleep,
The torment I have, it’s mine to keep.
Why should I share it, it will do no good.
Sick of it, you should, you should.
That’s all I hear, from those so sick,
They have no kindness, my scabs, they pick.
Open me up so the wound is fresh,
Having no idea my minds a mess.
So full of puss, full of bile.
I hate their narrow minds, they’re vile.
Resentment! Offender number one.
Fuck em, I just want to run and run!

Published ingeneral

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